Teenagers

Teenaged girls. Somehow I feel like I never accepted or capitalized on my teenage-hood. It wasn't until my years in college that I ever got that generally accepted notion of That Teenaged Experience....or more like the version of adolescence that movies show us. Only now is it that I look back on those teenaged girls whom I adored and secretly knew I would never really turn out like, and wonder what I could of experienced if I had gotten to known them better. There was one girl, Paula, who was my sister's friend.

My sister and I were still fairly okay with hanging out with each other despite our difference in age. And every now and then I'd get to hang out with her and Paula. My sister and Paula were girls scouts together...and I think thats how they met. Paula had wild white curly hair. It stood out everywhere. She was always so pale..pink white. She read Tank Girl comic books, took ritalin, and was into witchcraft. She was an only child who was adopted. The way she dressed herself was unlike anyone I had ever seen...she was like a villain character in one of my many comic books. There just wasn't anyone I knew who was even half as cool as her.

Once, she and my sister dug a cave in the side of a tall sand embankment along the creek. One night they snuck out of their homes to camp out in their cave...so with candles and sleeping bags they slept there. I think I remember the night they snuck out, and how I wished so badly that I could come with them.

Then my sister and Paula went through high school. Of course everything changed, as they often do, and I haven't seen nor heard from her in years. Last I heard she was working as a gunsmith somewhere. Of course she would be a gunsmith.